What makes you great?

I've got a task for you, it's a hard one, but so worth it!

Think of a time in your life where you were happy and/or content. Can you list 5 things that made you great in that moment? Write a list down and then for the next 5 days take one of those qualities, and live it for the day. To give you a head start I am going to tell you 5 of my qualities:

1. I'm kind

2. I'm fun

3. I'm intuitive 

4. I'm honest

5. I'm strong

Feel free to steal any or all of these! I would love you to report back if you have the courage. I hope you have a fantastic day. I plan to be kind all day ;)

9 Life Lessons by Tim Minchin

This is one of the best speeches I have read in a long time. It's very witty, funny and profound. Please have a read, or even better watch the video. 

http://www.timminchin.com/2013/09/25/occasional-address/?fb_action_ids=10151957035717743&fb_action_types=og.likes&fb_source=other_multiline&action_object_map=%5B525588400849030%5D&action_type_map=%5B%22og.likes%22%5D&action_ref_map=%5B%5D

If you like Vitamin D, that's quite alright with me

We have been hit with an early summer here in Australia. I have had the opportunity to get out in the sunshine a bit. Although I am usually donned with sunscreen, I am still soaking up the beautiful rays. I come home a lot more relaxed and in turn sleeping better at night. 

Have you ever heard of having the SADs? Seasonal Affective Disorder or the winter blues, yes there is actually a disorder for it. Probably the reason I only lasted one winter in London! 

More people are getting Vitamin D deficiencies. Vitamin D is a hormone which controls the calcium levels in the blood - assisting your bones and muscles. 

Stepping outside for a wander each day will not only make you feel better, it's good for your insides too! All things in moderation of course...

Step 4 in the Journey to Happiness

So a bit of a recap of the first three steps, thanks to my lovely friend Michelle at Gentle Warriors:

1. Breathe - give yourself time out and don't sweat the really small stuff.

2. Fake it - even if you don't feel radiant, put the smile on your dial and get positive.

3. Believe - in yourself and manifesting miracles. By affirmations, what and who you listen to, don't give up and stay positive. 

Step 4 - Gratitude 

"The Universe is grateful for you! Appreciation for everything flows through you in great bounty. Cherish the preciousness of life and everyone and everything around you." - Soul Coaching Oracle Cards Guide Book.

I have a question for you. What kind of grateful are you?

1. The kind that was brought up to use manners and then just automatically says thank you, without really thinking about what someone has done for you. Or

2. The kind that really takes note of the things that are given to you in life and pays it forward. 

I have realised I alternate between the two. I am always grateful, I just don't always show or acknowledge as much as I should. 

Sometimes I feel that thank you is enough, other times it isn't. How do you tell the difference?  I go with my gut.  For example, I am friends with Yvonne of Essential Insights, and on the weekend I was looking in my cupboard and noticed the large amount of essences I have ordered/received from her.  I was overwhelmed by her generosity.  Is this a time where I just say thank you?  I don't think so.  I have therefore popped something in the post to her to let her know her kindness is appreciated. She is a woman that does so much for so many and I never want her to feel she is unappreciated.

I am making it my intention to show my gratitude more, I figure it's a win-win.  You get to make people realise how valued they are and that they are making a difference.  You also put it out to the universe that you and this person are deserving of good things.   This brings more good things into your life, and you start to feel a whole lot better about life in general.  How could you not love that?!

How am I going to show that I am grateful?

- I have downloaded a gratitude diary to my iPhone (I am more likely to write in this than a journal as I have my phone handy most of the time).   Gratitude 365\

- I will update my address book so I can pop a note of thanks to someone when the time comes (making sure I have stamps handy!).

- I will use up more of my credit on my phone to drop someone a text message or even just make a call to say I am thinking of them and grateful to have them in my life. 

- Instead of "just" saying thank you, I will compliment the person who has shown me kindness, and really mean it.

It may sound so simple but it pays off in so many ways.  How do you show you are grateful??

What does Frankie say?

Relax! Am I showing my age/taste of music here?!

At least once a day you should find a way to relax, even just for 10 mins. I'm not talking about sitting in front of the TV, I mean doing an activity that is just about you. 

Are you one to meditate or would like to give it a go? There are free meditations on this website and tips on how to do it

 www.meditation.org.au

Are you someone who likes to take a long bath? Add some Epsom and sea salts to help the relaxation and your limbs. If you don't have a bath, have a longer than normal shower, get a face washer and put a few drops of lavender on it,  wet it and rub your body with it.

Do you read? Join a library, get the iBook app, or borrow from friends.

Go for a walk, even just around the block.

Take some deep breaths.

Do your favourite activity - golf, fishing, yoga, or bike-riding.

Listen to you favourite album from start to finish, sing along to feel even better!

Sit outside and watch the world go by.

If you're not sure of the kind of relaxation you need, the website below gives great suggestions based on your reaction to stress.  I'm not surprised I need to do rhythmic dancing!

http://m.helpguide.org/articles/stress/stress-relief-relaxation-techniques

Are you willing to share what you do to relax? Have a cup of tea and think about it ;-)

A bit of guidance

Continuing on from my blog yesterday, if you chose a number, here are your cards:

1. Family - this situation is rooted in an emotional experience with a family member, which we can help you to understand and heal. In your mind and heart, surround this person, yourself, and the experience with calming blue light and many angels. Be open to the gifts within the situation, and allow yourself to feel peace.

2. Wedding - marriage is the union of two souls joined in love, mutual respect, and commitment. It signifies a desire to deepen love over time. Your wedding day is a testament to your well-founded faith in love's power. Continually breathe life into that faith and love, Dearest One.

3. Trustworthy Guidance - you've received a wonderful idea in answer to your prayers. This idea is real and trustworthy. You can safely move forward with it, knowing that we are with you every step of the way. Ask for and be open to receiving our support for anything that you need related to this idea. 

4. Innocence - Beloved One, everyone is guiltless in truth, as no one can alter God's handiwork of perfection. Give us your feelings of heaviness so we can lighten your load. Give us any guilt, anger, or blame that may shroud your loving outlook. Enjoy the peace within your heart once more. 

5. See Only Love - look past the seeming errors, mistakes, and misunderstandings, and see only the love within each person (including yourself). Your resolute focus upon the love that underlies every situation brings about healing in undreamed-of ways.

6. Assertiveness - this situation can be healed gently and with love, as you've requested, yet there's also a need for your strength and truthfulness with the other people involved. We will stand right behind you as you speak your truth, giving you strength and guiding words. 

Who's up for some fun and guidance?

Pick a card! The cards are numbered 1-6, top to bottom and left to right. Comment below on which number/card you are drawn to and you will receive some guidance in return. I will post the cards later today. Share the love! 

Happiness is your right!

I just read this great article on being happy! It's

well written and proves that happiness is very

achievable. Enjoy and smile!

http://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/3909772

Always look on the bright side of life

I wanted to share with you a technique that my hubby and I use to pull each other up if we are speaking negatively. 

We have a code word to say to each other to bring attention to the fact that we are being negative. Our word is Elephant.  One, because my mum once said to me "relationships are like eating an elephant, you take it one piece at a time".  And Two, because I can't help but smile when I think of elephants, such beautiful creatures (hence my pseudonym).

So, my challenge to you is think of a word which makes you smile (beach, monkey, Eddie Murphy, bum!), tell someone close to you, who you talk to often, to say this word to you when you are talking negatively. You then have a choice - to stop what you are saying or, even better, turn it into a positive.

It is a challenge, but a worthwhile one. An exercise to help turn your words into your thoughts...

Let's Hear it for the Boy

Now that I have your attention (and hopefully made you laugh)! I wanted to talk about men and depression. 

This is a subject that as a woman I don't have "first-hand" experience but I do have men in my life who are battling depression. 

Men are practical beings. Unlike us women they don't particularly like to talk about everything they are feeling. 

So I am approaching this post in a practical way. I could say to a man - breathe and just get through each day as it comes. The men in my life would look at me like I thought they were an idiot!

So here is my list of options for where men can start play-wrestling the black dog:

1. Get active - step away from the gaming console and go outside, for a walk/run, fresh air, a swim, or even join a gym.

2. Phone a mate - call a friend who you can rely on to hold you accountable regarding fitness. They don't need to know you are dealing with depression, just that you want to lose some kilos/build some muscle. Someone you can check in with, say once a week, to report the exercise you have done. Even better if they do it with you. Find a way you can't lie to them about it too!! I'm not talking about a sexy selfie!

3. Get rid of grog - most people know alcohol is a depressant. Some people don't know that the mixer you are having it with doesn't help either. Soft drinks like Coke add to the headache the next day. If you really can't take the step and reduce drinking yet then try and change the amount and your mixer to something like Dry (I would also suggest Diet Coke or Tonic but I could already hear the groans from my Aussie friends!).

3. Have a MANtra - yes I'm erring on the warm and fuzzy side, but no one else needs to know about this one. What is something you can wake up and say to yourself every day (as many times as you need) to help you along?? Is it about what you are thankful for (friends and family, money, good teeth), is it your best qualities (nice/funny/smart/fit), or is that you have the control at all times and you are not going to let negative sh*t get you down?? Maybe decide this on a good day, write it down and put it somewhere no one else will come across it - sock drawer or your wallet...

4. Talk - the hardest for a lot of men - we need to get rid of the stigma that if you talk about depression then you are weak,  not a real man, etc etc. A man close to me recently spoke up to his mates about it and found out that some of them were dealing with it too. So instead of going out and just getting drunk with these guys they do fun/physical things. Whether its going to the driving range, paintball, cricket in the park, spotting each other at their home-gyms, or even something like having a game of cards/poker. Yes some friends may not know how to take it, tell them that's ok, you just need to look after yourself, and they are welcome to join you in whatever activities you do. 

Talking is so very healthy and it is one of the contributing factors as to why less women take their lives than men (statistically more women attempt it).

I know this is a bit lengthy and may have lost some guys in the process, but if you're still here (or even just read the first word of each point), good on you!! There are many more things you can do, but this is a start. If you are reading this and thinking of a male friend who may benefit, please share, they can do with it what they like but at least they will know you care. That's not a bad thing. Here are a couple of websites you can look at for ideas, support and statistics.

www.mantherapy.org (check out the Man Therapies, they are funny and useful!)

www.suicideprevention.com.au

I'm not OK but I'm embracing it

It's R U OK Day today. I urge you to ask your friends if they are OK. 

If you happen to get a "no I'm not OK", don't be distressed. Firstly, congratulate the person on admitting it (it takes a huge amount of courage). Then make a few suggestions:

1. Ask if they would like to talk about it (if anything, all you need to do is listen and be warm).

2. Ask if you can help in any way (lighten their load, help them realise how honoured they are).

3. Offer them options if that is what they need. Whether it is to speak to a professional, literature, remedies etc.

Most importantly, they need to be reminded they are very loved and never alone. Their own problems are never an "inconvenience" to you and if they ever feel that way, to get in touch with someone. 

You will see on the left hand side of my blog there are links to many websites which offer a multitude of options.

Are you going to reach out to anyone? Good on you for taking the time to read this and even sit for a minute to think about what can be done. <3

R U Ok?

In honour of Suicide Prevention Week and R U Ok Day tomorrow (Thurs), I have collaborated with a couple of awesome ladies to reach out to anyone who may feel a bit lost and overwhelmed with life. 

We are offering plenty of solutions to try and help you hug the black dog/embrace depression.  Yvonne and Charissa are based in Australia, but Charissa can work via Skype and Yvonne can post overseas (not sure of her prices but they are cheap as it is!).  Please see flyer attached, share it around and speak up, or even "just" ask someone R U OK? tomorrow.  Thank you for reading!!

Regression is progression

Yesterday was one of those days for me. I had a number of things happen which sent me into a downward spiral. BUT instead of letting these things get to me for days I took action. I called my mum and had a good cry, talked to her about why I felt overwhelmed and had the bile-tasting panic in my throat. She gave me options and told me she would take care of a few things to lighten my load. 

I talked to my hubby. He gave me a hug and told me not to just get into my PJs but to have a long hot shower and use up all the hot water. I didn't use all the water but it felt amazing standing under the stream for longer than my 2-minute-morning-marathon!!

The other thing he suggested we do is watch a comedy show, it was the last thing I felt like doing, but so glad I did. I was having a great chuckle by the end of it (it was Comedy Central's roast of James Franco, if you are into naughty humour).

My realisation today - I took my own advice and embraced my depression. I took steps to combat it - I talked, I cried, I nurtured myself AND I asked for help. Yay me!

Today I woken a lot more bright-eyed and bushy-tailed than I expected. I may have regressed a little but progressed in leaps and bounds!

It's not the end, my friend

I have been surrounded recently by a lot of people who have the black dog nipping at their ankles.  One of the main reasons I started this blog was to avoid people losing the battle by acknowledging the crap, but knowing there is an abundance of love and support out there.  This dog can also be trained and "nurtured".

My realisation of late is to "talk" and don't ignore it.  Keep up communication with loved ones, to know they are loved, and you are loved in return. 

If you are having any kind of bad feelings (they don't have to be suicidal!) talk to someone - friends, family or a professional. Today I caught up with some friends and told them what I have been going through, they had no idea and were so lovely about it. 

 Even just sharing a blog like this on Facebook, you never know which of your friends is in need (and from my experience a lot of them are trying to be strong or don't want to bother people with their issues).

I can offer you or any of your loved ones - support, honesty, a bit of fun and options. We are all on this planet for a reason. I'm just starting to figure out mine. That may be all they need to get back on track. A temporary driver to take the wheel while they have a breather...

There are lots of sites listed in this blog, I did find the site below interesting and really helpful.

My love goes out to the beautiful souls who don't realise how precious they are (yet!) xoxoxo

http://www.suicideprevention.com.au

Step 3 in the Journey to Happiness

So a bit of a recap of the first two steps, thanks to my lovely friend Michelle at Gentle Warriors:

1. Breathe - give yourself time out and don't sweat the really small stuff.

2. Fake it - even if you don't feel radiant, put the smile on your dial and get positive.

Step 3 - Believe

"Believe in yourself! Have faith in magic and miracles. If you can conceive it, you can achieve it." - Soul Coaching Oracle Cards Guidebook, by Denise Linn

I am a big believer in manifestation. What you put out into the world you get back. This week has been a huge reminder for me. I have had many friends and family members dealing with their "demons". Not to sound self-centred, but is it because I am going through the battle myself?? Do you ever think "gosh I am surrounded by a lot of miserable people at the moment"?? Makes me have a long hard look at how I'm seeing the world and myself in that moment.

What about a belief that everything works out for the best? A lot of people may try and beat it out of you. The catch is - only if you allow them.

Just this weekend I was told I am too empathetic AND I am always told I am too sensitive. Is there much wrong with that, especially in the world we are experiencing at the moment??

Perhaps people can't deal with such heart as it means being too authentic and people getting to know the real you. 

How does all of this tie into believing in yourself and miracles?? If you think with the outlook that you attract all good and amazing things into your life, then you deserve those things. Right?  

So how do I turn it around and start believing? There are a number of ways:

Written affirmations - a piece of paper on your mirror, a journal, a daily phone reminder. Whatever works for you. 

Listen to the voice in your head (hahaha) and what it is saying. Don't accept the negativity, turn it around.  

Get in touch with someone who will support your shift in attitude and direction. Even if its just "liking" a page or signing up to receive an uplifting blog you like. 

Give yourself time for it to work. Don't give up believing in yourself after a week because you haven't noticed any changes. They are manifesting behind the scenes and want to make sure you really want them!

To finish off, a corny quote from a great movie "If you build it, he will come".

I'm Walking on Sunshine!

5 simple things you can do to lift your spirits:

1. Listen to music - crank it up and sing along! Songs like Song 2 by Blur, Superstitious by Stevie Wonder, and Respect by Aretha Franklin.

2. Get Outside - for some deep breaths of fresh air or soak in some vitamin D.

3. Don't take yourself so seriously - go pull faces in the mirror at yourself. It's even funnier if someone catches you. 

4. Dance or do something silly like jumping on your bed (if you haven't tried it you should).

5. Make someone else's day - send a message to a friend with a funny picture, post a letter, perform a random act of kindness.

There is so much more you can do. Tap into your imagination and enjoy your day!

The Hard Truth

24th April 2012 - my brother's birthday and the day I started taking Zoloft.

I remember that day vividly. The lead up to it was intense. I had a 6 month old baby girl and my mother's instinct told me my 2 and a half year old son had Autism. I was not coping and my beautiful husband and gorgeous mum convinced me to go see a Doctor. 

When I spoke to the Dr she had a big chat with me and tested me on the Edinburgh scale for Post Natal Depression. We discussed my history and the fact that I have been dealing with depression most of my adult life. It varied from panic attacks, suicidal thoughts, and a general feeling of hopelessness. 

None of this made sense as I was generally healthy, had great friends, and lived an awesome life. When those black dog days/weeks hit it was awful. A Doctor ten years ago taught me the breathing techniques I have mentioned on here and said she believed that I would be over the panic attacks before any anti-depressants kicked in. She was right, but unfortunately only temporarily.

Back to my current Doctor, who explained that I had a chemical imbalance where my brain had trouble regulating my moods. It still didn't sit comfortably me (I have been known as a bit of a hippy!) but I took the script and left the Dr to call my brother for his birthday. 

I spoke to my bro and wished him a happy day, he picked up in my tone that something was up and convinced me to talk to him. Coincidentally (?!) my brother used to work for Pfizer, the company who patented Zoloft. We had a huge talk about it and what I was going through. He was my final saviour for convincing me to start taking it. 

I started on 25mg, which was great for my body to get used to it. Then up to 50mg. 

I am not one to condone pharmaceuticals but it has been a good step to take. I feel more balanced (certainly not numb) and it has given me the edge to get on with things, especially when the chips are down. 

It of course isn't for everyone and this is big step for me to even write about it. I have done this to try and shake some of the stigma that is attached to anti-depressants. They are not a symbol of weakness, more of honesty and an option to get that black dog off your back.  I encourage you to speak to someone, research and know you are NOT alone. Please share If you wish and thank you, as always, for reading!

The Five Step Journey - Step 2

Continuing the Five Step Journey away from depression, beautifully laid out by my friend Michelle at gentlewarriors.com.au

I have taken Michelle's and my own advice, breathed when required, and I'm already noticing the difference. Even my hubby commented that I appear to be happier in the last few days. Little things are coming back like singing along to songs, which I LOVE to do. 

So I think it's time for the next step. 

Step 2 - Radiance

"When you live in a state of radiance, you don't need to struggle for things to happen.  You shine so brightly that opportunities are drawn to you. Even if you feel dull and lethargic, you can transform your state by ACTING as if you're feeling expansive, content, and luminous." - Soul Coaching Oracle Cards Guidebook, by Denise Linn

Michelle could not be more spot on for this being the next step. Already this week I have been taking small steps in achieving radiance - smiling at strangers, bright clothing (or even just making an effort in what I am wearing), and dancing with my kids even though I don't feel up to it. What small steps can you take to achieve radiance??

Woe is not me

I had a coffee with a very good friend today who is going through some of her own issues. Someone said to her recently "when are you going to stop playing the victim?".  This really struck a chord with me and got the old brain working. 

Lately it has all been about me - I'm so tired, I'm so stressed, I'm so unhealthy etc etc. Why is it all about me at the moment? Some may say "it's my turn to look after me" but what good is going into my own shell going to do to help anyone or anything? Yes I'm struggling but I'm telling people. I'm not the only one who is having a hard time, what can I do for the others?? Lead and show its ok to say I'm not coping but I'm still here for you. They may end up saying the same thing back to you. Therefore working together for the greater good. I'm going to adjust a saying: there is no "I" in teamwork, but there is a "we". 

Some simple rules to achieve happiness...

The Grateful Alive

I am so appreciative to the lovely souls who have liked/shared/commented or follow my blog. This has really boosted my confidence and helped me realise that what I am doing is the right thing. 

It was a huge step for me and you should be proud of yourself that you are willing to support/acknowledge that people do have tough times. Happy Friday all and thank you for kindness and understanding xo

The Five Step Journey

Yesterday I received a beautiful set of handmade personalised affirmation cards from my friend Michelle at @gentlewarriors.com.au. 

I thought I would share each of them with you as I take the five step journey that she has intuitively laid out for me. 

Step 1 - Peace

"Breathe... And breathe again, deeply, and often. Everything is flowing as it's meant to be, smoothly and effortlessly. All is in perfect harmony." - Soul Coaching Oracle Cards Guidebook by Denise Linn

Today is all about finding my peace. It is playing with my kids outside. Shutting my eyes for 5 mins on the couch while they have their lunch. Turning off the TV and just listening to the sounds of my neighbourhood - the birds, the postman doing his run, my son playing with his trains, my dog chewing her favourite toy. Ahhh peace I do love you!

 

An ahhh moment..

In the last couple of weeks I have had several emails, phone calls and text messages from different people. Each of these souls have said the most beautiful things about our friendship. Some of them I would consider very good friends, and others I don't know as well. Without realizing it I have connected with them by being my authentic self. This has come back to assist me when I need it the most. These people have seen my pain, truth, heart and inner child. And they love me for it. How sacred is that?! 

My lesson today, when you are feeling lost in life, these people will help you find the soul they have known is there. Treasure these folks as much as they treasure you xoxo

Who you gonna call?

Today I'm feeling sorry for myself. Do ever feel like you have so many friends yet feel alone? I have many people I can call to lighten my mood but a) I just don't have it in me and b) I don't want to worry/bother them with my problems. My self esteem is so low at the moment I feel I really don't have much to add to a conversation.

A little voice in my head tells me to get over it. Just on the way home on the radio I was listening to the news about a couple killed in their home and kids with cancer. How do I get the perspective I need??? Get out of my head and into reality with people who, when I eventually call them, will help me realise why they are my friend - even if it has been a while. We don't have to talk about my woes, they may actually have things about their lives to tell me - new babies, promotions, even a good book they read! Simple but warm conversations. Who AM I gonna call?? There are many possibilities, thanks for allowing me to "talk" it out!!

Check your Mirrors and Sound the Horn

Yesterday was a day where I struggled. There didn't appear to be any reason why I was feeling down, and because of this blog I actually sat down and tried to figure it out (yay me!).


Check your mirrors - I realised I had been around some very negative people and this seems to affect me a lot. They got me on a weak day where I wasn't the positive and full of life gal I try to be. That was my first realisation. Although it is sometimes hard to remove yourself from these kind of people (co-workers down to shopkeepers), you can make a conscious effort to either not get involved in their negativity by not commenting or spin it into a positive. There are two ways they will react to this - not be negative with you anymore as they can't "feed" off you or become a bit more positive themselves! Either way it's a win-win for you.  Try and surround yourself with as much positivity as you can handle (people, books, music, good food - whatever makes you joyful!).

I also didn't listen to my daily podcast on the way to work, which generally gets me into a good frame of mind. I have been enjoying David Wood from The Kickass Life and Dean Dwyer of Make Shift Happen. Both are run by no BS men who have such an honest and fun outlook on life, just what I need!

The other thing I did was give my hubby a warning before I got home. I sent him a text saying I am hoping to lift my mood before I get there (listening to music, changing my thoughts, breathing etc). It didn't happen but I got home to an understanding man who was ready to take the reins. Previously I would have just snapped at him and left him wondering what he had done wrong.  

Sound the horn - I must admit it took a lot of courage to open up to my hubby and tell him what is going on in my head and sometimes there is no specific reason for it. I have done this with him and some close friends and family, so I have a bit of a support network.  This support may be in the form of a listening ear or someone to jump in and fold your washing!
 
Some friends didn't know how to take my depression and have taken a back seat.  I am now ok with that (of course I was hurt at first). Most people don't know how to deal with depression, but if you have it in you to look further into how you can help there is a multitude of resources such as Beyond Blue, Lifeline or PANDA for post and antenatal depression (these are based in Australia).

If you are someone who is reading this and dealing with depression (or even think you might be), then these places can really help.

A big thing I learned yesterday is give yourself a break and don't beat yourself up if you are feeling that way. I gave lots of cuddles to my little girl, I ate a lovely dinner and hugged my husband for the rest of the night.  Quite blissful now I look back on it.  CUCO - Chin Up Chest Out!

Getting over the Overwhelm

One emotion I experience a lot is overwhelm - the shortness of breath, the feeling that everything is flying at you too fast, not enough hours in the day, everybody wants a piece of you and there is no time left for you.  Sounds pretty normal for a lot of people when I say it like that!

The first thing I need to remind myself to do is Take a Deep Breath (or as many as I need), there are breathing techniques you can learn to cope with things such as panic attacks.  The technique I was taught is as follows:

• Take a deep breath in, hold it for 5 seconds
• Breathe out and then hold that for 5 seconds
• Breathe in and hold it for 3 seconds
• Breathe out and hold it for 3 seconds
• then repeat the last 2 steps 10 times (total)
• finish off with holding it for 5 seconds

This was taught to me by a Doctor when I was experiencing panic attacks and it worked really well for me (distracting me from the issue at hand).  I showed a few different people in my circle of friends who I spent a lot of time with, in case I had a panic attack and couldn't remember the steps. 

The next thing for me would be to Get Organised.  I previously did up a family planner which I will go home tonight and fill out.  I did up a table and then laminated it so I can write on it each week and stick it on the fridge, the columns would be:

Across the top - the days of the week

Down the side are:

Me - including exercise time, time for me (yes I plan to get at least 1 hour a week!), appointments and social plans

Hubby - similar to mine

Kids (listed separately) - day-care days, appointments, nights away

Meals - dinner each night

Notes - necessary things to be done each day (feed animals, perhaps one cleaning job a day)


Lastly if it is all too much for me in a day, I ask myself "If I don't do this will it be detrimental to me or my family??".  An example of this is cleaning - things such as tidying and making beds, if I don't do them one day and give myself a little break to prioritise other things, it is not going to affect me or anyone else is a serious manner.  Sometimes I need to chill out and not sweat the small stuff (my hubby is better at pointing these things out to me!).

This has been a good little reminder for me today, I hope it works for you too!

Elly

What's it all about?

So here it is, my first EVER blog post!

Why the name “Hug the Black Dog”?? A couple reasons:

-          My plan is for this blog is to be about embracing depression – hence hugging the Black Dog.  Having a “Black Dog on your back” is a reference to depression which Winston Churchill once famously quoted.  He spoke of the menacing, growling beast that waits in the shadows and can strike at any second.  My take is instead of fearing that dog; you give it a pat, some kind words or even a treat!

-          I also own a black dog and she is the loveliest, happiest and most beautiful dog I know, she represents the opposite of what a “Black Dog” should be. 

I have just this week decided that instead of being the strong one, playing the martyr and ignoring my own needs, I will honour my depression, with which I have dealt with for years (I prefer not to use the word struggle).  I plan to blog about the range of moods I experience and may learn for me (and others if it happens that way) – why they happen, what I can do when they occur, what the world can offer when I am not coping, what I can share with the world when I have my good moments (and there are plenty of them!).

This is something I am initially doing for me but I decided on a blog as it makes me accountable and if someone can get a little bit of respite from something I have said, or know they are not alone in this world, then that is enough for me J

My personal feeling is that depression is not discussed enough and especially in my culture it is brushed under the rug.  Why not embrace it and be in touch with the REAL you?  I think I may end up realising I like the real me and the friends that decide to stick around in the process.

I don’t know how often I will post here; it’s a trial and error thing.  I haven’t put my real name as I will be talking about family etc and they deserve privacy (it’s a good place for my hubby to come check up on me too!).  So if you have read this, thank you, welcome and please share the real you with me!  Elly J