Let's Hear it for the Boy

Now that I have your attention (and hopefully made you laugh)! I wanted to talk about men and depression. 

This is a subject that as a woman I don't have "first-hand" experience but I do have men in my life who are battling depression. 

Men are practical beings. Unlike us women they don't particularly like to talk about everything they are feeling. 

So I am approaching this post in a practical way. I could say to a man - breathe and just get through each day as it comes. The men in my life would look at me like I thought they were an idiot!

So here is my list of options for where men can start play-wrestling the black dog:

1. Get active - step away from the gaming console and go outside, for a walk/run, fresh air, a swim, or even join a gym.

2. Phone a mate - call a friend who you can rely on to hold you accountable regarding fitness. They don't need to know you are dealing with depression, just that you want to lose some kilos/build some muscle. Someone you can check in with, say once a week, to report the exercise you have done. Even better if they do it with you. Find a way you can't lie to them about it too!! I'm not talking about a sexy selfie!

3. Get rid of grog - most people know alcohol is a depressant. Some people don't know that the mixer you are having it with doesn't help either. Soft drinks like Coke add to the headache the next day. If you really can't take the step and reduce drinking yet then try and change the amount and your mixer to something like Dry (I would also suggest Diet Coke or Tonic but I could already hear the groans from my Aussie friends!).

3. Have a MANtra - yes I'm erring on the warm and fuzzy side, but no one else needs to know about this one. What is something you can wake up and say to yourself every day (as many times as you need) to help you along?? Is it about what you are thankful for (friends and family, money, good teeth), is it your best qualities (nice/funny/smart/fit), or is that you have the control at all times and you are not going to let negative sh*t get you down?? Maybe decide this on a good day, write it down and put it somewhere no one else will come across it - sock drawer or your wallet...

4. Talk - the hardest for a lot of men - we need to get rid of the stigma that if you talk about depression then you are weak,  not a real man, etc etc. A man close to me recently spoke up to his mates about it and found out that some of them were dealing with it too. So instead of going out and just getting drunk with these guys they do fun/physical things. Whether its going to the driving range, paintball, cricket in the park, spotting each other at their home-gyms, or even something like having a game of cards/poker. Yes some friends may not know how to take it, tell them that's ok, you just need to look after yourself, and they are welcome to join you in whatever activities you do. 

Talking is so very healthy and it is one of the contributing factors as to why less women take their lives than men (statistically more women attempt it).

I know this is a bit lengthy and may have lost some guys in the process, but if you're still here (or even just read the first word of each point), good on you!! There are many more things you can do, but this is a start. If you are reading this and thinking of a male friend who may benefit, please share, they can do with it what they like but at least they will know you care. That's not a bad thing. Here are a couple of websites you can look at for ideas, support and statistics.

www.mantherapy.org (check out the Man Therapies, they are funny and useful!)

www.suicideprevention.com.au